“I want you to say the bill I like will help francophones. I'm filling time with a friendly soft ball.”
What they said. What they meant.
Plain-language translations from the House of Commons.
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A motion to debate the CRTC ordering online streaming services to pay more tax. The Conservatives argued this tax increase will be passed on to consumers. The Bloc argued the real issue is the government failing to implement a tax on digital products that would fund culture. The debate devolved into partisan bickering, with the Conservatives accusing the Liberals of controlling the CRTC, and the Liberals bringing up unrelated past statements by Conservatives.
“I want to cheer for a program that spends money in my riding. I'm learning French and I like cartoons. I think they're a central part of our identity.”
“I suck up with kind words. I use nice words instead of answering. I want the government to make rules that help my friends. We should use government money to make things more fair. Everyone should watch Canadian shows.”
“I don't want to address specifics. I want to say the other side doesn't care about the arts. It's not fair to blame everything on this one decision. We should protect our own industries instead of worrying so much about what the US thinks. We're doing a lot of things to help people keep their jobs. I don't have time to list everything.”
“I'm changing the topic to the United States. Maybe if I talk about the United States people will ignore how we are making everything cost more money in Canada. Canada should be independent. I don't want to make it easy for people to have nice things.”
“I don't like that you might not support tax dollars going to all of the arts performers who are very important to who we are as a nation. Taxpayers must spend on my preferred program! I want you to attack the Conservatives some more instead.”
“I want global streaming companies to give money to Canadian producers like Canadian broadcasters must. This helps Canadian jobs and economy. It's not a tax or penalty, it's investment. Other countries do this too. We need to support Canadian culture and stories.”
“Make them repeat the question. I want to talk about our virtuous goal, not who pays the tax.”
“We all care about Quebec culture. But we shouldn't rush into anything. We're negotiating with the US right now. We need to be careful how we proceed.”
“I want to defend our party against the Bloc. We're not caving! I should ask a question about how the CRTC decision will help protect Canadian and francophone culture. That will make us look good.”
“I already said we want to protect French. But I came to list all the ways our government spent more of your money on it. Numbers! Big numbers! That's what we do.”
“I want the government to promote my preferred language and culture.”
“I want to change the subject. I don't want to talk about the CRTC's tax hike on streaming services. Instead, I'm going to accuse the Conservatives of not caring about Canada and claim they are surrendering Canada's sovereignty to the United States. I'm going to talk about Donald Trump for some reason. I don't want to answer the question.”
“The CRTC is separate from the government. Other countries have a fee to protect their arts. I think Conservatives want the US to control our arts. I want Conservatives to support Canadians instead of the US.”